I’ve been having a hard time lately, comparing myself with people two to three decades older than me. On days when my pain is especially bad and my joints aren’t cooperating, it’s hard to see a 60-year-old who can move better than me. On days when I compare myself to people like this, I tend to get depressed. And therein lies the problem: we have to stop comparing, because wherever we are, we are good enough.
I can’t do triathlons anymore because I can no longer run. High impact exercise isn’t really an option anymore either. And I have to wear braces on my knees and wrists whenever I do the exercises that my body can still handle. But I do exercise when I can. And I’m a good mother. And I’m a good wife. And I’m a good person.
Stop comparing: you’re good enough as you are
Comparing myself to other people doesn’t do anyone any favours, least of all me. Even comparing myself to my previous self isn’t exactly healthy, if I can’t move forward with my life because I’m getting hung up on all the “can’ts” or “shouldn’ts.”
We all do this: we all compare ourselves to others. I think women do this frequently, especially when it comes to comparing ourselves to another woman’s fit body. I’m guilty of this for sure. Back when I was in the best shape of my life, I used to love my body.
Loving a heavier, more strained, less capable body is a lot harder. But it’s even more difficult when I keep comparing myself to others: an unfair comparison, because the people I sometimes envy don’t have the same conditions I do, and they know nothing about what I fight every day: the pain, the pushing through so I can still live my life to the fullest.
We talk a lot about how we shouldn’t judge others and how others shouldn’t judge us, but I think we’re a little less ready to stop judging ourselves. The truth is, if we continue striving to become better people, we’re already good enough as we are. We shouldn’t halt all progress because we’re “perfect” (no one is), but we shouldn’t punish ourselves for not being good enough either.
Know that God loves you just the way you are, but wants to see you continue becoming the best version of yourself. Not because you want to fit in to an unrealistic ideal or society’s expectation, but because you want to be the best servant and neighbour you can become, to serve as Jesus served.
Perhaps I’m getting too philosophical, but this post is as much for the readers as it is for me: comparing hurts me. Moving forward doing the best I can do is always the best option.
How will you show yourself some love today?